Get a Gorilla-Grip Bussy With These Kegel Exercises for Men

Want to get a firm grip on your main squeeze? Learn to strengthen your bottoming muscles with these Kegel exercises for men.
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November 10, 2024
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You've probably heard of Kegels before; these internal exercises have been in the workout repertoire of vagina-equipped folk for ages. Not only do they help with incontinence, they provide benefits in the bedroom, too. But did you know Kegel exercises for men can provide you with the same great results?

That's right: Dawn is rising in a new era for all of you anal enthusiasts out there. Gaining control over the tightness of your back door is an empowering thing. With 20% of Grindr users saying working out is their top pastime, adding Kegels to your fitness routine makes perfect sense—not just for your overall health but for enhancing your sexual experiences as well.

But what does it take to get a decidedly dense derrière? Let's go through all the reasons why Kegels could be the secret ingredient missing from your sex life. Then, we’ll show you ways to develop your very own Kegel exercise routine for men.

What’s a Kegel, anyway?

Sorry jocks and twunks; all that time in the gym isn’t enough to make you a good lay. It’s what’s on the inside that really counts. We’re talking about your pelvic floor. Sure, mirror muscles make for excellent eye candy, but your pelvic floor controls essential internal functions that benefit your health and sex life.

Have you ever tensed up mid-pee and interrupted your stream? That’s your pelvic floor at work. These muscles in your undercarriage support your organs, facilitate sexual function, and help you hold it when you reeeeeally need to go to the bathroom.

Kegel exercises are like the gym workout for your down-under region. So, if you want to be a rock star in the bedroom and stay leak-free when you hit your golden years, give Kegels a try.

The benefits of a buff badonkadonk

You’ve probably already guessed Kegels for men (specifically, people assigned male at birth) will have different effects than for others. But despite becoming famous for helping people tighten their vaginas, virtually everyone will see a better sex life when they do Kegel exercises.

Here are ways Kegel exercises benefit you sexually and physically:

1. Keeping it tight

Let’s start with your most burning question: Will my hole actually get tighter? Yes! Studies show that Kegel exercises can improve anal squeeze pressure. They also improve the sphincter muscle strength and tone.

In addition to making the experience more pleasant for your top, this means less leakage, fewer farts, and a lower risk of pelvic organ prolapse. Keep your culo in prime condition, and you’ll be power-bottoming for years to come.

2. Longer and stronger

If you still aren’t sold on Kegel exercises for men, the benefits are also essential for top-notch topping. Your pelvic floor muscles are responsible for controlling a lot of your plumbing, including your urinary tract and even the other white meat; that's right — your pork and beans.

It’s well established that Kegels help people with vaginas experience stronger orgasms, but penis-havers may benefit, too. Some studies suggest Kegels help with erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation (but these conclusions are also premature; research on the subject is limited).

3. Fewer potty breaks

Exercising your pelvic floor muscles keeps them from getting too weak or tight; both come with unique problems. An overly tense pelvic floor can cause muscle pain and cramping, increase your need to urinate, and create musculoskeletal problems in your hips or back. In contrast, a weak pelvic floor can cause stress incontinence, aka leaking urine, when you sneeze or cough. 

Needless to say, a lot is riding on having strong pelvic floor muscles aside from your riding ability.

How to build your rectal routine

Finally, it's time to get physical. Get ready to wreck your rectum (Not like that! Well, maybe eventually like that…) with these Kegel exercises that will keep your pelvic floor muscles nice and tight.

Now that you know where your money maker gets all its ink from, it's time to practice your contractions. You can do these discreetly all day since you can activate these internal muscles while sitting or standing. And you don’t need a Kegel exercise device for men, either — just your body!

Here's how you activate the bussy-tightening muscles:

  • Contract your pelvic floor muscles for a few seconds. (You should feel things tighten up mostly in the rear.)
  • Relax for the same amount of time.
  • Repeat the cycle 10 times.

This is a simple Kegel routine you can do several times per day. There are several specialized variants you can try to really up your anal acumen.

Going for distance

Slow Kegel exercises help you work out the slow-twitch muscle fibers by holding your pelvic muscles for longer durations at a lower intensity. Aim for a 10-second flex during each rep. These increase endurance, so the muscle holds out longer during sex.

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Useful as a pre-Pride weekend workout or for when your partner comes home from the club with whiskey dick, the extra endurance is also beneficial if you want to avoid urinary incontinence.

Going for speed

Fast Kegel exercises activate different fibers in your pelvic floor muscles — the ones responsible for strength and power. This is the workout for those of you who want to win the title of Iron Anus. (That's a thing, right?)

This exercise is similar to the first, but the hold is much stronger. Focus on retracting your penis and lifting your testes with sheer force of will while keeping your abs and glutes relaxed. That's enough to break a sweat! Only hold these for about one second, then relax.

Bottoming requires both power and endurance, so alternating between these two focuses can help you achieve more well-rounded results.

Tips for aspiring bowel bodybuilders

Gym rats probably already know how to maximize their gains in record time. But what if your preferred method of exercise is bringing a chip up to your mouth like a bicep curl? We feel you. Here are some tips to get more out of your Kegels.

Gradually increase the time

You can start with three-second contractions. But like any good exercise regimen, you'll want to move the goalposts as you get better. A good goal is to eventually get to 10-second contractions and relaxations.

Spice it up

Unless you can lift a dumbbell with your dick, it might seem impossible to switch up such a simple exercise. But diversifying is actually a breeze.

Practice shorter contractions followed by longer ones. It's the same concept that you'd use for working out any other muscle in your body, now applied to the one in your ass!

Higher reps

You might think pelvic floor exercises for men are a walk in the park, but that's because they're meant to be done in higher rep sets throughout the day. Aim for 30–80 reps each day, starting at the lower end if you're new to working out your rear end. No need to head to the gym for these either; it's easy to do them wherever you are. 

Use them in a pinch — literally

Kegels can come in clutch if you struggle with stress incontinence. If you're worried you’ll spring a leak, a quick pelvic floor exercise can buy you time until you get to a restroom. Again, not exactly a mind-blowing anal sex secret, but it can keep you from soiling yourself until you get to a toilet (or your partner's chest, if that’s your bag).

Maintain focus

When isolating a muscle group, keep everything else relaxed to ensure you work out the right ones. You can prevent activating other muscles by keeping a hand on them to feel if they contract when you're doing your Kegels.

Get tight with other guys on Grindr

You have the power! A tight man clam is within your grasp. Like any good exercise, consistency is vital, so keep up with your Kegel regimen.

Are you ready to reap the benefits of your Kegel routine? Then come sow your wild oats on Grindr! Get the Grindr app, or browse hands-free with Grindr Web — the same Grindr you know and love, now available on your laptop or PC with no download required.

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