The Grindr Guide to Handling Unsolicited Dick Pics
It happens when you least expect it. Amid the peace of your morning yoga session. On a crowded train during your daily commute. While you indulge with a glass of rosé and a face mask. Suddenly, your phone screen lights up with a notification. But instead of a funny meme hitting your inbox, there it is, with zero warning: some dude's dick hanging around like a hot dog on the 5th of July.
Unsolicited dick pics are common in gay dating and hookup culture. And while some might laugh off or hit the “block” button, dick pictures you didn't want can feel invasive and sour the fun of online dating.
Don't let a NSFW photo of a penis give you a softie for dating. Here's Grindr's guide to deciphering that unwanted prick pic and what to do if you feel like sending one.
Why do guys send dick pics?
Receiving a dick pic is like when a cat brings you a dead mouse. We know they’re proud, but we’re just going to throw it away. So why send a dick pic in the first place? Here are six reasons:
1. Gotta catch ‘em all
“I'll show you mine if you and you'll show me yours.” He’s probably thinking if he sends you a shot of his, you'll respond with one of your own. Basically, he's soliciting a nude dick pic with an unsolicited dick pic, but the math isn't mathing.
2. You’re cordially invited to sex
His unwanted phallic photo is so mesmerizing you immediately drop everything, hop in an Uber, head over to his, and hop on that dick. In addition to being obscene, this fuccboi thinks the only detail you care about is his dick. Snore.
3. He likes making you uncomfortable
An unsolicited dick pic is a power move. But unlike consensual, Dom/sub BDSM role-play, he gets his rocks off feeling a sense of control over you. Part of the sexual fantasy is forcing you to look at his penis or making you angry or annoyed. We're all for exploring your kinks and fetishes with new partners, but coercion is a big red flag.
4. Dick worship
A person with a penis who sends a dick pic might be obsessed with their wiener. They're so proud of their penis they feel like everyone wants to grab a glance. Their egos depend on receiving compliments about their dreamy dick, or on the flip side, they love insults about their puny pecker.
5. He’s working on himself
Sending unsolicited dick pics might be a way of overcoming body shaming, albeit extremely misguided. After all, you didn’t sign up to be someone’s boner buddy.
6. Low-key homophobic
Internalized homophobia is never fun to come eyes-to-dick pic with. He might believe in harmful gay stereotypes and assume you’re an over-sexed horn dog with dick permanently on the mind. Or he’s sissifying you and sending a dick pic to let you know you’re lesser than his “big, manly” member.
How to respond to a dick pic you didn’t ask for
If you’re on an online dating app, you’ve probably received a nude. Here’s what to do when you don't ask for it.
1. Delete and block
Responding to an unwanted dick pic can be as simple as taking out the trash. Delete the photo, block him, and move on with your day.
2. A dick for a dick
If he expects you to be absolutely flabbergasted by his rod, you can respond with a pic of your own. Bring his ego back to size with a picture of your big, beautiful, veiny cock — that he will only see on a phone screen. Strike a pose, take your best nude, and make some pornographic art — just make sure your face isn’t in it.
3. Laugh out loud
Revenge is a dish best served cold. Three letters: L-O-L. It’s simple and ice cold, like his lil weenie.
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4. Pick your fighter
Sometimes, words aren't enough to express the visual aneurysm his dick pic gave you. But emojis can. If a "rolling on the floor laughing" or "face mask" emoji isn't explicit enough, the message a magnifying glass or telescope sends should come through loud and clear. To really let them know his dick pic is out of pocket, a coffin, trashcan, or hammer emoji is just the right amount of aggressiveness.
5. Photoshop it
Respond with a ridiculously unrealistic fake dick pic. Stick a cucumber in your briefs, stuff a handful of hot dogs in your fly, or photoshop an absolutely massive cock. We mean Eiffel Tower-sized penis, literally. The bigger and more ridiculous, the better.
6. Not impressed
Most likely, he's trying to impress you. A simple "not impressed" will go straight for his oversized ego. Pair it with a gif, like someone rolling their eyes or glancing up and down.
7. Confuse him
He really thought he was doing something. His pic was meant to leave you tossing and turning, hungry for his cock. Respond with total ambiguity, like, "Haha" or, "Hmm, cute," and leave it at that. Let him badger you for a few days and leave him on read before you block him.
8. Thank him
Tell him that, thanks to him, you discovered your phone’s pinch-to-zoom feature.
9. Actually, no, thanks
Whatever he wants, you’re ordering something else. A simple "No, thank you" and blocking will let him know he fucked up the vibe with his unnecessary chode shot.
10. Educate him
You don’t have the responsibility to be someone’s teacher. But if you want him to think twice about sending a dick pic to someone else, you can let him know how receiving the picture made you feel. Something like, “I was interested in getting to know you, but sending me that dick pic without my permission is a huge turn-off.”
11. Report him
If the dick pic feels like intentional sexual harassment, you might be able to report him. Some states consider unsolicited dick pics lewd online content, which can be a misdemeanor criminal offense.
Should I send a dick pic?
Did he ask you for it? If the answer is no, that’s the end of the conversation.
- Check their preferences: The Grindr app has a preference for accepting NSFW photos with options for "never," "not at first," or "definitely, yes." If you're cruising on Grindr, check his preferences, respect him, and sext responsibly.
- Be direct, not photographic: If you're looking for an easy hookup on a dating app, there's nothing wrong with getting straight to the point. A flat-out "Do you want to have sex?" says way more than a dick pic. And if he wants to know what he's working with beforehand, he'll ask.
- Flirt with emojis: Honestly, a dick pic is kind of basic. It's the sexting equivalent of skipping foreplay and jamming it in with no lube. Get creative with emojis like the standard sweat drops or a cowboy and donkey combo, and let the virtual undressing happen naturally. If you want to become fluent in the art of emojis, check out Grindr's sexting emoji guide.
- You're more than your genitalia: Obviously, we love a pretty dick. Size queens might disagree, but when it comes down to it, your dick is most likely more functional than museum-worthy. Physical attraction lives on a spectrum, and it's a lot bigger than that bulge in your pants. Try enticing him the old-fashioned way with a selfie that shows off your smile, the contour of a strong shoulder or chest, or, if things are getting hot, a booty shot.
Papa-paparazzi
You got style. You got grace. And now you know how to give a winning response to an unsolicited dick pic. If you’re looking for a gentlemanly guy who has the decency to ask before sending you a photo of his schlong, you’ll find him on Grindr. Download the Grindr app today.
