Cuffing Season! Meaning It’s Time to Find a Hunk to Hunker Down With
Ever wondered why the season before winter is called fall? It’s because you’re supposed to fall into bed and eat your body weight in Cheez-Its. But don’t you think that would be more fun with a partner? You’re not the only one. With the leaves changing and the mesh tops getting swapped out for cozy sweaters, we all feel the need to find somebody to snuggle.
This urge is so common there’s actually a term for it: cuffing season. It’s about finding the person who wants to binge the same Netflix shows as you over a steaming cup of cocoa. The kind of partner who can keep you warm throughout the winter months with more than just his crocheted scarves.
But what’s the deal with cuffing season? Is there a cuffing season schedule that you’re already late for? (Kinda, but we’ll get there.) Whether you’re looking to fill a seasonal position or get filled in every position, we’re spilling the spiced tea about this special time of year.
What is cuffing season?
Cuffing season is that delightful time of year when the temperatures drop, and the desire for love (or at least a warm body) rises like a loaf of sourdough bread (or that other thing that rises).
What does “cuff” mean sexually?
OK, but what’s with the name? Does this slang term refer to the cuffed Levis that start talking to us like the Green Goblin’s mask as soon as the leaves start to change color? Not quite.
The term “cuff” comes from “handcuffs,” meaning you’re committed to someone for the season and not letting go. Nothing says romance like a touch of mutually enjoyable bondage, right?
But cuffing season is about more than sex or physical desires. It’s also the time of year when we’re vying for more emotional connections. Something about the fall and winter weather causes insatiable cravings for affection that no amount of turkey and presents can fulfill.
When is cuffing season?
The cuffing season schedule usually kicks off around mid to late October. It stretches through the winter months and into Valentine’s Day. Think of February 14 as your final relationship exam, where you determine whether your new boo has passed or failed. That means we’re covering the following:
- Halloween (couple’s costumes!)
- Thanksgiving (quelling Mom’s concerns about you being single forever!)
- December holidays (insert holiday-appropriate reason to be excited here!)
- New Year’s Eve (ball dropping!)
- New Year’s Day (hangover cuddles!)
- Valentine’s Day (sharing a bottle of wine with someone other than your cat!)
If the relationship is still progressing after your initial October to March trial period, you can see what spring brings for you crazy kids. If that’s what you’re after, you should establish early on whether this person is in it for the long haul. Otherwise, you’ll be heading into a single summer you never asked for when you could have been finding Mr. Year Round.
Origins of cuffing season
Where does cuffing season come from? It’s somewhat biological; we’re pack animals, so it only makes sense that we want closeness during the season when we mostly hibernate and focus on connection.
The term “cuffing season” was coined in the 2010s, when everyone realized bingeable fall and winter TV shows were much more enjoyable with a companion. It’s especially nice when your delivery Chinese food arrives and you don’t feel like getting up to answer the door.
Thanks to social media, the term spread like wildfire among millennials and Gen Z, and it’s been a staple in dating and relationship culture ever since.
Why do people seek relationships during cuffing season?
The desire for a designated snuggle bug is a good enough reason to seek companionship during cuffing season. But there are a few other reasons a guy on a dating app might audition to be your temporary boyfriend:
Holidays
Nobody wants to be the only uncoupled person at a holiday gathering. Sure, being your own date is an empowering experience, but holiday traditions are much less lonely when you’ve got a right jolly old elf by your side (preferably one who’s chubby and plump). Otherwise, you’ll be kissing your hand under the mistletoe and searching for some rando to lock lips at midnight on New Year’s.
Of course, we can’t deny the whimsy of a mistletoe meet-cute. Maybe that’s how you find your late in the season ’ship.
Family expectations
When are you gonna settle down with a nice guy already? Grandma is as sick of asking as you are of hearing it. A cuffed-up cutie provides a simple but elegant solution. When you’ve got a romantic relationship locked down, you can finally talk about something else at the dinner table.
Few people are seeking out casual relationships just so they can silence their nosy relatives. But it’s a nice perk when you realize you can finally slurp up that weird cranberry sauce in peace.
Seasonal depression
It’s not a glamorous reason to couple up, but it’s certainly a common one. Many people who experience seasonal depression or SAD (seasonal affective disorder) are searching for comfort and affection to help them get through the cold weather.
The shorter days and lack of sunlight can make that pining for peen even more palpable. But truthfully, a mutual connection — physical or otherwise — is a terrific way to chase the winter blues away.
How to navigate cuffing season safely
Cuffing season can get a little intense, so you need to take care of yourself once the fall free-for-all is in full swing. Here’s what you can do to keep yourself safe and sane while everyone is seeking someone who will tolerate apple-picking with their second cousins:
Communicate
Surprise, surprise: Communication is a must whether you’re just dating or in a committed cuffing season relationship. Set clear expectations so you’re both on the same page about what you want — even if that’s just someone to make you popcorn so you don’t have to get up from the couch. It’s completely fine to expect exclusivity (or the freedom to have sex with whomever you’d like). You just need to be upfront about it.
Focus on your emotional well-being
Are you going hard in the paint with cuffing season because it’s making you feel good? Or are you more interested in having a warm body you can drag to social events to fill the void while your favorite show goes on hiatus? These are essential questions to ask yourself so you don’t get into a seasonal relationship for the wrong reasons.
Set boundaries
Following up on the communication point, you should establish what you’re comfortable with in your relationship. For example, you would never let your partner watch the new season of Below Deck without you.
More importantly (depending on who you ask), what does time spent together look like? How comfortable are you with their desire for an emotional investment? Boundaries are always a slay, but they’re especially vital when looking for cuffing season companionship.
Winter is coming — are you?
Cuffing season could seem sketchy to some. But it’s a stellar opportunity to find love — or at least someone to share your bone broth with (you can decide if that’s a euphemism). Meaningful connections during cuffing season happen all the time.
So, don’t get discouraged if you’re dating around in search of a long-term relationship. Eventually, you’ll find the person who holds the key to your heart — not just to your cuffs.
Not sure where to look? There’s all kinds of cuffing and stuffing happening on Grindr. Download the Grindr app today to get started.